Friday, March 18, 2016

Why we haven't been at Sunday morning worship...

It's all excuses... Really it is. And I know it is, but darn it...it is still rough, and I'm only human.

I absolutely love Sunday morning worship! Parker does too, and my hubby! Even with our strong admiration for that 2 hour block of time, only once a week, we haven't been there for probably a month, or more, now. I miss it, I really do. I know that if I could just get the energy, nerve, and strong desire to go that I would be so glad that we did. But it's so stinking hard for me! :( 

With my hubby working such a ridiculous schedule he is only actually able to go about once a month... Give or take! And by that time, there are usually a lot of things at the farm pulling for his attention. Or dang it, I just want ten minutes of his time even! 
And getting three little babes ready for church, bellies fed and myself put together takes not only time but SO MUCH energy... So so much energy. By the time we pull up, I'm exhausted. We are late. The boys are loud. Aspen is hungry. 

We get in the pew and it's rough... I'm trying to keep Aspen happy, keep Noah sitting down and not expose my breast to those sitting around us. Parker has learned to be some-what quiet and tries to help with Noah. Parker gets dismissed to Junior Worship and I wonder if it will be easier now that it's just two kiddos or worse because I don't have backup to grab Noah when he tries to dodge under the pew in front of us. 
I have given up all three times that I've attempted church with three kids and taken Noah to the nursery, even though it pains me. 
I can't fully explain my reasoning but I believe my kiddos should sit with me durning church... I don't think any different of mothers who take their littles to the nursery. I just feel like mine should be in the pew beside me. 

After church I have to wrangle all three kiddos together again. Parker never listens (can't figure out the point in parenting that we screwed that up, but we are trying to work on it!) so I'm hollering at him, while holding Aspens car seat and Noah on my opposite hip, and somebody who most likely doesn't talk to me outside of church (no offense meant by this)  is trying to make convo with me... 

Ugh! By the time we get in the vehicle and head down the street for home I am crabby, and irritable and not Christ like... AT ALL! :( 

Now that I've given all of my excuses, I wish that I could just get over myself and get my but in the pew... Until then, at least you know why I'm not there.... In case anybody has missed us 

P.S. I know these photos have nothing to do with church... But those boys are stinkin' cute! 

Blessings, XOXO
-Dakota 

4 comments:

  1. Girlfriend..... I haven't been in a church service FOREVER!! August refuses to sit still or be quite and he still has such separation anxiety, that I won't do the nursery ... unless I am working in there. Justin is sound-man, so we can't even take turns. I miss it too, and I believe the fact that I do miss it is a great sign that my faith is important to me. But worship service is a one size fits most. It's just seasonal that you and I can't get there. The relationship with Jesus and your family's personal growth in Christ is what is important. Although, church service should help this growth, there shouldn't be fear of guilt from missing it to tend to children. XO, Emily

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    1. Emily, you truly have the most encouraging words!!!! Thank you! Your response is exactly what my heart needed.

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  2. Hi Dakota,

    Honey, God knows your heart and he loves you. I have a hard time getting there at times, and I don't have "littles". I have other distractions and reasons. Enjoy your family and worship in your own way. I so admire you :).

    Syndee West

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  3. Thank you for such kind words Syndee!

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